Tuesday, November 06, 2007

Animal House, Jr. sponsored by Campus Life

Nebraska School District Bans Christian Group After Bobbing for Live Goldfish.

LINCOLN, Neb. — A Christian student group's latest attempt to show middle school students how fun the group could be was too much for school administrators to swallow.

I realize that there's this whole, deeper metaphor between Christ and fish, but... I do recall that Christ allegedly divided the DEAD fish amongst his followers.
Last week the Campus Life group allowed students to bob for live goldfish. Two students and one Campus Life volunteer swallowed fish.

It's just sushi!!!
No student was harmed or forced to participate, but some parents complained, and district officials weren't pleased.


No STUDENT was harmed, but PETA is going to have a field day.
"We just felt like that type of action was distracting to the students and interfered with the learning process," Virgil Horne, assistant to the superintendent, told the Lincoln Journal Star.

Oh, sweet irony! I think the whole "let's pick theistic sides" during school hours is distracting, but...ya' know, that's just me.
So Campus Life will be allowed to meet only at Lincoln's Scott Middle School one more time this school year. The group's executive director, Bryan Carlson, said he would tell students the news at Wednesday's meeting.

Doesn't "ban" contradict "one more time"? They've got divine leadership and they still need the school cafeteria? Who wants to lay money on when the prayer vigil (for the fish? No...for the group) will take place outside the school?
Carlson said the goldfish bobbing was designed to foster fellowship among the roughly 100 students who regularly attend. At previous meetings, races, relays and competitive eating contests have been used for that purpose.

Goldfish bobbing = fellowship? Is this the Church of the National Lampoon? I love the idea that "fellowship" is promoted with, at least three, deadly sins: envy, gluttony, and pride. I guess nothing says "Christian fellowship" better than wolfing down twenty hot dogs in a race to prove that you're better than all of the other kids at the table. Wooooot!
The opening fun activities were always followed by sermons and small group discussions that Carlson said were the point of the meetings.


Fun for the kids...but, for the gold fish? Eh'. Not so much.
LOVE the admission that the real goal of a religious group meeting on a PUBLIC. SCHOOL. CAMPUS. is to promote sermons and evangelism.

10 comments:

JP said...

Glad I found your blog, I'm enjoying reading through the archives.

On another note, ouch, sorry for the crap you had to go through with that John character. Some of the garble that came out of his mouth, especially stuff concerning your previous medical issues infuriated me to no end.

Ben said...

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,308405,00.html

IGWT posters going up.


Grrrrrrrrrrr

Atheist in a mini van. said...

Well fuck, Ben.

That makes me want to move. I know that Jack was at the meetings...we need to do a podcast so I can bitch about this. And, so Jack can share what happened.

SWE said...

Wow-I was never a joiner but wouldn't some slimy goldfish have quite the a-lure...

Anonymous said...

Just to let you know,live fish carry,worms and other nasty kritters. Time for a worming!

popeyemoon said...

Anonymous said...

Just to let you know,live fish carry,worms and other nasty kritters. Time for a worming!

7:42 AM I am popeyemoon I forgot your rules on anonymous.

Steve said...

What's next? Shoving live gerbils up their butts?

Saurian200 said...

Steve,

What's next? Shoving live gerbils up their butts?

Of course not, that would be weird.

...

I think I just pulled my sarcasm muscle. I need to lie down.

Atheist in a mini van. said...

JP, thanks for reading. Welcome!

Steve said...
What's next? Shoving live gerbils up their butts?


No. I think in the grand chain of Christian hazing, gerbil stuffing comes after the ritualistic goat sex. Yeah. I think it goes; eat a live goldfish, wear a stupid costume for Jesus, a team building exercise requiring toilet paper and eggs, ritualistic goat sex, and THEN gerbil stuffing.

Atheist in a mini van. said...

Saurian,
I think I just pulled my sarcasm muscle. I need to lie down.

Remember, ice...then heat. ;)