For those who have wanted to hear my temple story, you can hear about it on the Eight Hour Lunch Podcast. Their podcasts are worth listening to even if you're not an ex-mo, but...are really entertaining if you have even a passing fascination with Joseph Smith's vision (punny, huh? I honestly didn't see the pun until editing).
Anyway, it would seem that one of their LDS listeners was really pissed. Here's their reaction to the EHL podcast:
Jazz fan said: You are a miserable human with Satan's tongue and ways. Going through the temple is a sacred experience and you befouled it. Heavenly Father should cast you into outer darkness for hearing the sacred words of Moroni and participating in our holiest of holy rituals. You only look like a sad atheist, bereft of Heavenly Father's guiding hand. Do you remember the punishments that you heard for those who would commit such acts of apostasy? There will come a day when Christ will return and reign for hundreds of years. You have already taken up the sword of Satan. Your record will show your acts of disregard for His ordinances. D&C 76:82 is your fate. You are a daughter of perdition.
Hello Jazz Fan,
First of all, I have a passing knowledge of LDS theology (not great, but passing) and I happen to know that I don't qualify for apostasy. I was never baptized into the LDS faith! Therefore, how could I possibly leave something that I was never a member of in the first place? As for being a "daughter of perdition",...again, are you sure you're LDS? My understanding of the "sons and daughters of perdition" is that they are people who were given the full and complete gospel (according to Joseph Smith and his hierarchy of rich, white, dead polygamists) and THEN rejected it. The term only applies, as I understand it, to those who received a spiritual witness or calling within the LDS faith, but then chose to go against that calling. As I was never LDS, I'm pretty sure it could be argued that I never received the full and complete gospel (according to Joseph Smith and his hierarchy of dead, white, polygamists (TM)).
I also think it's completely hysterical that you expect your "heavenly father" to toss me into the outer darkness because his secret-spidey-septuagenarians were unable to use their gifts of discernment to keep me out of the temple. Like I said in the podcast, I can think of at least four ways in which I didn't qualify to be there:
1. Unmarried female.
2. No mission or calling.
3. Not baptized LDS...and, actually, worse- I was a baptized CATHOLIC.
4. I'm pretty sure I'd drank a Pepsi Clear right before going into the temple. So, the WoW was clearly broken.
The Pepsi Clear, in and of itself, is something I deeply regret drinking (because, it shows my age and it was nasty!).
Why did no one "discern" that I shouldn't be there? I'll tell you why! Because, the whole "spiritual discernment" thing is a load of crap. People might have instincts, but they definitely didn't come from a deity. And, if they had discernment, the people who let me go through the ENTIRE CEREMONY had it turned off. Maybe it was they who should have been smote down for allowing me in?
Possummomma, Temple Crashers Union 101
Oh...and for those who imbibe, the EHL also has nice little drink recipes in their podcasts. Yum.